I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
