I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize