Can Purell be used as lube?
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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