he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
You made out with two different species that night
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
