I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
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