just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
