you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I'm experimenting with sincerity
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
