he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Girls should come with a carfax report
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Every concussion has its silver lining
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Randomize
