This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
