idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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