Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
