is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
