Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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