Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
