I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
it's like heaven, but drunker
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
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