I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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