on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Randomize
