ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
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