sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
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