I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize