Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Randomize
