you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
