two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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