And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Randomize
