I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
