smell my finger.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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