and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize