Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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