Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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