Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
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