Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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