I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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