His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
