our cab driver is having phone sex.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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