im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Randomize
