okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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