he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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