do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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