i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
