I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Randomize