we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
