Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
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