i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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