As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize