your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
