porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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