It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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