anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
