And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
This is my gift to your gina
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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