Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Mom said you looked used
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
