Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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